A Self-Professed Ex-Sasaeng Opens Up About Why She Decided To Quit Harassing BTS
A self-professed ex-sasaeng opened up about why she chose to stop her activities of harassing BTS.
When a poster on Internet question board Quora asked: “What made you stop being a sasaeng fan?” User Kasami Yamamoto (likely not her real name) shared her experiences being a sasaeng, as well as why she finally quit. Kasami shared that she was a sasaeng from 2017 until December 2019.
I was a sasaeng from sometime in mid 2017 up until only a few days ago. I knew that bts didn’t like sasaengs but I didn’t care, I just liked the attention. Being a sasaeng was a time consuming hobby and eventually it started to take over everything. I no longer liked other things or had time to do anything else. I would just always try to be close with bts even if they hated me for it.
—Kasami Yamamoto, former sasaeng
Although she occasionally felt guilty for her actions, she just couldn’t stop herself from being a BTS sasaeng fan. She also stated that many of the leaks came from within Big Hit Entertainment.
The ways I obtained info was just heinous. Honestly thinking about it now, bighit has some internal problems to fix, because some staff would exploit Bangtan just for money.
—Kasami Yamamoto, former sasaeng
Kasami says that she was also friends with the infamous no pants girl, and has expressed being proud of their connection. Being friendly with so many fellow sasaengs, Kasami became a reliable source for information and started earning a lot of money from selling the information she gathered.
Soon, I became a “reliable source” for information about kpop idols and I started making quite a bit of money from selling their information. With the money I got, It would just help me follow my idols even more places to get even more money. I took a lot of private photos and videos that I have now deleted.
—Kasami Yamamoto, former sasaeng
When BTS’s V did a live broadcast expressing how uncomfortable he felt with having sasaengs on the plane with him, that was when she began to truly experience feelings of guilt but she brushed it aside. Instead, she chose to embrace her want to get closer to him.
They would sit in front of us or right next to us, and it made us a little uncomfortable. Well, honestly, I wish they wouldn’t do it. It scares me.
—BTS’s V
You may find yourself wondering: If she didn’t want to stop being a sasaeng when she heard about how miserable she was making BTS, what actually made her decide to stop once and for all?
Well, at the end of last year, a close friend of hers decided to stop being a sasaeng. Seeing their sasaeng friend suddenly decide to change their lifestyle shook Kasami to her core. It was then that she, too, decided to pursue healthier interests.
To be seeing such a big sasaeng and friend to me leaving made me have a reality check. I started researching around with other people’s reason why leaving the community. I felt like it wasn’t worth it anymore, so on December 23rd, i told my sasaeng friends that I want to be happier and not harm bts anymore. Surprisingly, they said they wouldn’t judge me for leaving and that they still loved me.
—Kasami Yamamoto, former sasaeng
Despite leaving her sasaeng lifestyle behind, she revealed her old accounts are still active and being run by a sasaeng friend, with whom she still keeps in touch.
I’m no longer still in the community but my friends are. I’ve given my account over to another friend of mine so she could take over.
—Kasami Yamamoto, former sasaeng
At the end of it all, Kasami expressed regret for her actions — although how genuine that regret is when her accounts are still active remains to be seen — and realizes she cannot take back the actions that have hurt BTS.
To this day, I regret everything I’ve ever done to hurt them deeply, but I cannot take back my actions.
—Kasami Yamamoto, former sasaeng
Previously, YouTuber Sherliza Moé interviewed a former BTS sasaeng who even went so far as to go on the same flights as them.
